The Epic is over.
The Ironman is over.
What now? Those months of training have now come to fruition and resulted in the harvest of your fine racing results. So well done to all the other mid-life crisis exercise junkies who are compelled to complete gruelling endurance events to realise a sense of self worth. You've crossed that finish line and realised a dream. But seriously - now what?
Here is a list of post Epic (and Ironman) withdrawal symptoms that should have kicked in by now:
- Its Saturday morning - you're having breakfast with all the members of your family - and you feel like its been 7 months since you did this. ("..Hey Ethan - since when do you like poached eggs? Oh - for two months already now...oops"...)
- You're awake at 4am - without the alarm clock - and you're actually thinking about going for that ride. ("...I could just go...but where are my cycling shoes? And where did I put my helmet...ag, forget it...")
- You walk into a DVD store and realise you can choose TWO movies for the evening. ("Hey babe - do you want to do a boy/girl classic movie double up? We can watch Dirty Dancing and then Apocalypse Now... I only have to be up by 7am!)
- Friday night braai? You're ON! ("...Sure I can bring my own drinks. How does 12 beers sound?")
- Your mates want to go for a casual ride on Saturday (less than 30km in the mountain) and you're cool with that. ("...you mean I don't need to do the Peak and The Mast as well? Cool...")
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This may well happen - just smile and wave, boys.... |
- By now so many people have asked you how the event was that you've got it summarised to two or three sentences. ("ja it was tough; we had a few mechanicals - but I really enjoyed it and we finished hey... Sure I'd do it again.")
- The strange odd aches and pains that you didn't notice during the race now come and manifest themselves in your body (..."I can't open the valve on my bike tube any more. My fingers are still aching from all the riding..and my toes are still numb!")
- You have an abundance of gels and powders left over from all the training - not to mention the many bottles that now clutter the lunch box tupperware cupboard (...if one more bottle topples over when I'm looking for the lid then...AAAAH DAMMIT!!! *bouncing bottles fall onto the floor*)
- You're in the garage and your bike catches your eye. You walk up to it and admire the work that the machine did for you (..aaah yes. You beautiful thing...tyres still good. Some stickers still left on it...hmmm - I really must drop you off for a service...)
- You are scheduled to travel up to Joburg for a business trip. And its no problem because you won't be missing out on 3 valuable training sessions (...In fact - let me just stay the night so I can sleep in at the hotel and eat a monster dinner as well!...)
- You've already forgotten the worst parts of the race (..."yoh - that stage 5 was tough...I just remember all those climbs...and that weird singer in a tent...was that before or after the muddy day?)
- All your close mates also want to do the event (..."and then I'm going to ride the DC...and then the Argus...and then I'll be ready! And I have a mate who knows a guy who will sponsor us for the Epic. No problem!...)
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So you might feel like a bit of a rockstar afterwards. Go on - soak it up! It doesn't last long. |
- Your sporting mates (who have never done the event) all knew exactly how your team would perform in relation to other teams and openly provide detailed post-race analysis of the outcome (..."Ja - but you guys were way stronger than Paul and Philip. They just didn't have the mechanical issues you guys had... But did you see how Moose and Gav steadily increased their GC each day? That's because they got stronger as they rode - Gav is that kind of rider and Moose was patient...and Team Fat Bob know this event as its their sixth time together - so naturally they would do well...")
- For the Ironman finishers - your horde of followers have analysed the results spreadsheet and have mapped out your split times versus the winner and a few other recognised athletes ("Ja, I mean I checked that you were out of the water 77th - and then your got on your bike 65th....I mean, that's a quick change!")
- Post race bike and equipment analysis is a huge topic (..."Well I used Shimano and I had no issues. My partner was on SRAM and he had kak every day...EVERY DAY. As for those KAK Specialized tyres - the sidewalls are too soft!")
- Sponsors and race organisers also don't escape a grilling (.."And I don't know what all the fuss was about Assos coming on board. We got nothing - I mean NOTHING - from them. Not even a discount on bibs! And a souvenir Epic jersey? How much do you reckon it was...how much? Try two grand, bro! And as for that toiletry bag they gave us to pack our things into....I'll just bring a school satchel next time...")
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Ah yes - no more weight watching for a while. That third beer tastes the best (especially with that little fatty lamb chop starter!) |
- Your peruse the net for post-race photos and write ups (...aha! Heres a cool YouTube summary of the day. My mates have got to see this! *click - send* )
Anyway - its all over. For now. There are many relieved spouses who are delighted to have their partners home. Sure, they'll need to endure a few weeks of post race discussion - especially at those Friday night braais that you're now able to attend again. But they'll also be proud of your achievements.
Will I ride the Epic again? Well - it will be the third one...and this last one wasn't so bad! Hell, if I look back now I can hardly remember any tough days! So - if anybody knows of a willing sponsor for 2015 - please send me a personal message, OK?